Couchsurfing - Experiences of a Solo Female Backpacker

Many fellow travelers would have either participated in or heard of Couchsurfing. For those who have not heard of CS, in its most simplistic form, it is an online community that helps travelers find hosts to stay with in different cities, without paying money for accommodation. I first found out about CS when I was researching how to travel on a budget. Of course, the idea of free accommodation sounded very alluring but once I became a part of the CS community I realised that it was much more than a platform for travelers to find a free hotel.

I have to say, I have made many great friends through CS who have either been my host or I have met at CS events or hang outs. For those who are still hesitant about meeting and staying with a stranger in another country, don't worry because many surfers and myself were in the same position as you when we first started. I just wanted to make a list of pros and cons from my own experiences to help those who are considering participating in CS.

The Good FANTASTIC

My first time ever surfing someone's couch was in Munich. It was my first time in Europe and obviously I was still a little nervous about staying in a stranger's house in a foreign country. I was essentially putting myself in my host's hands.  I relied almost exclusively on positive feedback from other CSers on my host's profile and the few conversations we had via Facebook or CS messages to understand the type of person they were.

Fortunately, my first experience couchsurfing was stellar. It could not have gone any better and my impression of couchsurfing was astronomically positive. My host was amazing and very generous for hosting me for longer than planned. Although he had to work, he still managed to show me around different spots in the city and was a good influence for me to continue couchsurfing. This positive experience followed on with my other hosts in different cities such as Salzburg, Dusseldorf, Berlin, Hamburg, Venice and London. I was grateful and amazed that my hosts could always be so hospitable and welcome a stranger like me into their home with open arms. I can definitely say couchsurfing had been a big part of my fun experiences during my trip.

Another great thing about CS is even if you can't surf or host, you can still meet some great people through organised events. You can participate in CS events while travelling or even in your own city. These could range from monthly or weekly drinks, movie nights, pub crawls and sports events. This still gives you a chance to get to know other couchsurfers whom you can network with and meet again in the future. I've found Russian bus mates in Brussels, Spanish and German amigos in Sydney, Finnish friends in London, and Belgian buddies in Salzburg all through CS events.

Through CS I was able to see cities with locals and learn more about their culture, make great new friends, and it obviously helped my budget. The latter became a less important point to me when the benefits of meeting interesting and awesome people from around the world far outweighed the idea of me saving a few dollars.

The Not So Good

Unfortunately, not every CS experience I've had were so peachy. I had maybe the most irresponsible host whilst CSing in Milan. What was surprising was he had stellar feedback from both male and female CSers on his profile, was vouched for and was verified. However, my experience surfing with him was anything but positive. It was the first and only time I had felt very uncomfortable with a host.

To keep the story short, it involved:

• Not replying to my messages to confirm a meeting point and time until the last minute and "forgetting" to give me their number
• Leaving me to wait, with all my luggage, at the train station he told me to meet at for more than 45 minutes after the time HE told me to be there by. He finally calls me and tells me he won't be there until 2 hours later, at 9pm, because he was eating dinner.
• Assuming I wasn't surfing with them anymore simply because I did not reply "OK" to their message telling me where to meet them. Even though they had my number and could've called me for confirmation at any time.
• Hosted 2 CSers at once when he hardly had time or room for one. (This wasn't so bad because I still managed to make friends and hang out with the other surfer)
• He was moving houses during this period and failed to mention this in his CS invite. This meant he was too busy MANUALLY MOVING HOUSE VIA BACKPACK AND TRAIN to do anything or even give us information about the surrounding area.*
• Didn't let us stay in the flat if he was out, even though the other CSer was sick and should've had more rest during the day. I didn't mind since I had my own plans but I thought it was very inconsiderate for the other CSer.
• Essentially kicking both CSers out before the planned date with one day's warning. He was suddenly going out of town,  for reasons unknown.
• Didn't bother trying to have proper conversations with me or just gave short and simple answers. This wasn't due to a language barrier because his English was quite fluent. It was more because he wasn't interested in talking to me. (Maybe he thought I was boring :( )
• And what ALL female CSers fear -  He got touchy

This is the abbreviated version of my experience with this host, who on paper was the model host, but in reality was just irresponsible and borderline creepy. I only stayed with him for 2 nights, originally meant to be 3 but before getting to Milan I decided I would leave a day early for Florence. I couldn't find an alternative last minute couch or a hostel because he had no wifi and unluckily, on Sunday the internet cafe closeby was closed. Additionally, my fellow CSer had stayed with him for 3 days before I arrived. She told me she had similar negative experiences with him. The day she got to Milan was the day he moved into his new house. There was essentially nothing in the house, save for some furniture, and she ended up buying the groceries. She also had no warning about him moving houses during this period. Shamefully, this was the only time I had used CS just to benefit from free accommodation. I'm trying not to paint myself as someone who demands or expects my host to be a personal guide and chaperon, but I was just a bit shocked that he wouldn't mention any information to us before hosting us. I would've been fine with it if I knew in advance that he had other commitments and would've made plans for myself. With him, there was simply no connection, he didn't have the time for us, and he had no intention of staying friends with us afterwards.

However

I am glad to say that my negative experience was just one isolated incident and I would still continue to participate in CS in the future. I hope it didn't discourage anyone but I couldn't just tell you one side of the story. There will be some people you may not like very much but don't let that ruin other potential good experiences you could have with CS. Most of my CS experiences have been amazing and unforgettable. I will putting up some tips for CS first timers in a later post which I hope can be somewhat useful for those who are interested in CS.

For those who have done CS, what have been some good and bad experiences you've had with hosts or surfers? Leave a comment below :)

*This host had sent me a CS invite on his own accord. It had stated he wanted to exchange travel stories, teach me how to cook Italian food and show me around his favourite parts of the city. This invite was only 1 week before I got to Milan. He omitted vital details like him moving, which he would've obviously knew about at that time, and possibly being too busy to do any of what he proposed in his original invite in subsequent messages. With this information I could've weighed up to see if there were other hosts that would've been better for me to stay with. He also ignored many of my other messages before I asked him about where to meet.